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Dispatches from the Heart

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The Fambush: What to do When Old Family Dynamics Break Through Your Boundaries

October 13, 2025 Jared Gottlieb

A fambush is exactly what it sounds like—a family ambush. But it’s so much more, too. It’s when all your hard-earned growth and adult boundaries are ripped away in an instant, and you’re pulled back into the roles, wounds, and power dynamics of childhood, helpless to stop it. A single comment or action can rattle your nervous system. You’re not responding from the present, but from years ago. How is it that we can come back into presence and agency from this place.

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How Do You Thank the Man Who Saved Your Life Twice?

September 25, 2025 Jared Gottlieb

Pat Mahoney with me in Carrboro, NC during my cross-country trip in 2017

I was 22 and unraveling in ways I could not yet comprehend when I first met Pat Mahoney. He wasn’t famous or a sought-after expert. Google him today, and you’ll find a dated WebMD profile with no reviews, no photo, just a generic silhouette of a man with a stethoscope. But to me—and to countless others—Pat showed us the way back to ourselves.

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Reflections of a First Generation White Jew

September 24, 2017 Jared Gottlieb
Photo courtesy of the Barbara Gottlieb Collection. From left: Cousin Stacey, Grandpa Murray, Cousin Aaron (on his Bar Mitzvah day), me, Uncle Tony, Dad (John)

Photo courtesy of the Barbara Gottlieb Collection. From left: Cousin Stacey, Grandpa Murray, Cousin Aaron (on his Bar Mitzvah day), me, Uncle Tony, Dad (John)

Culturally, I’ll always be Jewish. My anxiety a daily reminder, though well worth the rights to the jokes. Culturally, I’m also White. I’m first generation White. I’m the first in my family to walk around thinking that I’m White before thinking I’m Jewish. My mother was denied jobs because of her last name. That’s not been my story.

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